Dating and unbeliever
Many of the young people call it "Hanging out together" and claim that it has nothing to do with love or affection--so they claim.
I would say that once it becomes apparent, to any member of the church, that another member/attendee is becoming involved in a romantic and/or love relationship with an unbeliever, that they must go to the person as step one of the Matthew 18 process, and then follow the rest of the process if necessary."Here at Grace, we believe that the Bible teaches that believers should only marry other believers. Thus, we would strongly discourage any believer from pursuing a dating relationship with a non-believer.
That way, I could skip all the Bible passages that urge singles only to “marry in the Lord” (1 Corinthians ) and not “be unequally yoked” (2 Corinthians ) and the Old Testament proscriptions against marrying the foreigner, a worshiper of a god other than the God of Israel (see Numbers 12 where Moses marries a woman of another race but the same faith).
You can find those passages in abundance, but when someone has already allowed his or her heart to become engaged with a person outside the faith, I find that the Bible has already been devalued as the non-negotiable rule of faith and practice.
Instead, variants of the serpent’s question to Eve—“Did God really say?
” are floated, as if somehow case might be eligible for an exemption, considering how much they love each other, how the unbeliever supports and understands the Christian’s faith, how they are soul-mates despite the absence of a shared soul-faith.
Over the course of our ministry, the most common pastoral issue that Tim and I have confronted is probably marriages—either actual or proposed—between Christians and non-Christians.
I have often thought how much simpler it would be if I could remove myself from the conversation and invite those already married to unbelievers do the talking to singles who are desperately trying to find a loophole that would allow them to marry someone who does not share their faith.
If only I could pair those sadder and wiser women—and men—who have found themselves in unequal marriages (either by their own foolishness or due to one person finding Christ after the marriage had already occurred) with the blithely optimistic singles who are convinced that their passion and commitment will overcome all obstacles.We could talk for hours about shared ideas and interests.Then he slipped me a note during class to ask me out to a movie. He was shy, a bit awkward, and I knew from reading the stories he wrote in a writing workshop we’d both attended that he had little confidence when it came to his appearance or appeal. I found this out two days after we set up our date, when a lecture on evolution prompted the religion discussion we hadn’t had yet.Having grown weary and impatient, I want to snap and say, “It won’t work, not in the long run.Marriage is hard enough when you have two believers who are completely in harmony spiritually.