Assertiveness in dating
If you are a very angry person, you probably have strong issues with shame.
When practicing self-exposure before doing an assertive act, you will probably feel fear and doubt.
In the next step, what you can do is to practice transferring your healthy assertiveness from one area to other areas where you have problems being assertive.
You can model your assertiveness best in order to use it in all the life situations that require assertiveness. The best way to become more assertive is to practice assertiveness.
People who are naturally assertive had their needs properly met when they were young.
With fear and doubt, you are constantly caught in an emotional cage. So expose yourself to the point where fear and doubt are still manageable.As you begin to face your fears, your anxiety naturally decreases during exposure. Many times, we assume that other people know our needs, that they can read our minds. As we said, under-assertiveness is often based on guilt and shame, and over-assertiveness is based on need inflation and escalation. The purpose of guilt is to meet your moral standard.Below are a few ideas how you can practice exposure to develop assertiveness: A very important part of this step is to work on your communication skills. You feel guilty when you assume you’ve done something wrong.But false guilt, with an overly strong superego, is always looking for people to please and rules to keep. Feelings of shame are based on the belief that you’re bad, flawed and not lovable.With strong feelings of shame, it often even comes to emotional substitution, and you prefer to feel anger with other people rather than shame with yourself.